Missed Fists: Boxer’s brutal below-the-belt bonanza, more

Welcome to the latest edition of Missed Fists where we shine a light on fights from across the globe that may have been overlooked in these hectic times where it seems like there’s an MMA show every other day.

Boxing took center stage this week, with Top Rank bringing the sweet science back to the United States for the first time since the outbreak of the coronavirus by setting up a “bubble” at the MGM Grand Convention Center for a pair of shows.

But you know us. Rather than celebrate the return of an American institution, we’re going to focus on what makes combat sports truly great: crotch punching.

Jessie Magdaleno vs. Yenifel Vicente
Shakur Stevenson vs. Felix Carabello
Gabriel Muratalla vs. Fernando Robles
Guido Vianello vs. Don Haynesworth

Both Tuesday and Thursday’s Top Rank main events proved noteworthy, though for different reasons and it’s a shame that Yenifel Vicente’s loss to Jessie Magdaleno (h/t Bloody Elbow) put a slight damper on an otherwise celebratory week for boxing.

Things began well enough for Magdaleno as he scored first blood with a knockdown off of a gorgeous counter in the corner.

He continued to put it on Vicente, which prompted the Dominican veteran to decide it was time to sink or swim. And by “swim,” I mean begin an all-out assault on Magdaleno’s testicles.

The first low shot in round four earned Vicente a two-point deduction — a punishment that doesn’t exactly fit the crime — and also resulted in a stunned Magdaleno taking a straight right across the jaw. Big ouch.

Not satisfied, Vicente went back to work in round 10. As you can see from the Twitter comments in the previous clip, there are a few viewers who thought that maybe Magdaleno’s belt is just too high up on his waist. Have no fear, Vicente erased any doubt as to where he was aiming with his final barrage of low blows, taking his time to load one up and then later just launching an uppercut between Magdaleno’s legs.

Finally, referee Robert Byrd waved the bout off after deducting approximately 47 points from Vicente during the bout. All those warnings did a lot of good, eh?

Two nights earlier, Shakur Stevenson showed how to properly aim shots above the belt, scoring a crippling body-shot knockout of Felix Carabello.

That is power meeting precision right there.

In a sweet story from Thursday’s show, preschool teacher Gabriel Muratalla improved to 3-0 by showing his educated hands against Fernando Robles.

The commentators were talking about his students might have been watching Mr. Muratalla at home, which is a cute angle to take, but I’d rather these tots not see him bludgeoning another man into submission. Regardless, stay in school, kids!

Zipping back to Tuesday, we have to show Don Haynesworth taking the Humpty Dumpty Fall of the Week, courtesy of a right hand from Guido Vianello.

Poor Haynesworth, almost looks like he took a step back and got tripped up by the Shogun skateboard.

Krystian Kuzma vs. Lukasz Zaluska

Not to be outdone, a GROMDA Fight Club event in Poland last Saturday featured a bare-knuckle boxing knockout that requires a parental advisory warning. Seriously, this one is bad.

And the aftermath, even worse.

The perpetrator in this case is Krystian Kuzma, appropriately nicknamed “Tyson.” He has Lukasz Zaluska on dream street well before the fight is actually stopped and with his man in his sights, Kuzma fires off a scorching uppercut that may as well have been aimed at a heavy bag. Though if he’d landed that punch on a bag at the gym, it probably would have snapped off the chains.

Alexander Lunev vs. Evgeniy Sleptsov
Alexey Kostarev vs. Mikail Bitel

If you want some MMA action to chew on, here’s Belarusian Fighting Championship bringing it as it has all throughout the pandemic. In the main event of BFC 54, featherweight Alexander Lunev trapped Evgeniy Sleptsov in a lovely triangle armbar to improve to 6-0 as a professional.

Just 19 years old, Lunev has scored all of his wins by submission. No question, this young Russian is one to watch.

We also want to show some love to flyweight Alexey Kostarev for this wicked muay Thai-flavored finish of Mikail Bitel.

It’s not too often that we see a 125-pound bout ended with sharp knees in the clinch like this, though one notable exception does come to mind.

That’s all for this week’s highlights, so let’s signal the end of this round with a resounding horn from the Fight Contra o Covid event in Roraima, Brazil, last Saturday.

Did I say resounding? I meant adorable.

The Call-Up

A hearty congratulations for two fighters set to make their UFC debuts this Saturday after doing damage on the regional and international scene for the past few years, Christian Aguilera and Gustavo Lopez.

Aguilera has been a standout in the Legacy Fighting Alliance, authoring several highlight-reel knockouts and attempting one of the best moves I’ve ever seen in a fight, a “showtime hammerfist.”

That’s the kind of creativity that gets you to the big show.

Lopez’s signing has already provided its fair share of drama, with the Combate Americas bantamweight champion involved in some contract controversy as he signed on to replace Ray Borg against Merab Dvalishvili on just two days’ notice. Combate Americas President Campbell McLaren said on Twitter that this promotion had the rights to match any offer that Lopez received, casting doubt on whether Lopez would step into the octagon tomorrow, but the dispute appears to have been settled amicably.

That’s a good thing, because Lopez’s skills deserve as much shine as possible.