It's fight week, ladies and gentlemen, and you know that means. That's right. All aboard the hyperbole train! Choo-choo!
Today's sampling isn't much of a new pound-for-pound revelation or even a dubious title shot promise. Instead we have something unrelated to Sunday's festivities in Boston, as UFC CEO Lorenzo Fertitta recently talked to Yahoo! Sports about the impact Ronda Rousey's success has had on the overall sports landscape, and he wasn't shy with the breadth of his responses.
"I feel like this is a seminal moment, not just in sports, but in culture altogether, this movement that is being led by Ronda Rousey," Lorenzo Fertitta told Yahoo! Sports. "It's female empowerment. I mean, who's to say, why can't a girl be a fighter? Why can't a girl be successful in sports like these other athletes in sports? Why couldn't Ronda Rousey be the biggest, most popular athlete in combat sports? And that's her whole attitude, and that's why she is getting there.
"She's blazing a trail, and I think what's happening for females in sports, the most interesting story and the most important story in sports is the UFC, because we've embraced it."
Far be it from me to minimize what Rousey has accomplished over the past few years, because it's certainly nothing short of remarkable. But still...
"[Rousey] has been the most impressive athlete we've ever worked with here at the UFC," Fertitta added. "I mean, I put her right up there with the best of the best."
Nope, not touching that one. Your morning coffee? Grab that sucker and lean back in that seat on yours, because y'all, we have some headlines to get to.
5 MUST-READ STORIES
UFC Fight Night fun. The stars were out in full force in Boston yesterday ahead of UFC Fight Night 59. Catch up with Conor McGregor, Dennis Siver, Donald Cerrone, and Benson Henderson to get your violence quota grooving as we roll into the weekend.
This is why we can't have nice things. Remember that awesome fight between Jacare Souza and Yoel Romero at UFC 184? Well... it's cancelled. Because of course it is. I swear to god, Injury Bug, one more of these and I'm hunting you down.
Jenkins' serendipitous road. Phoenix, Arizona. Homewood Suites. Floor four. Room 416. It may not mean anything to you, but for one-time NCAA champ and burgeoning featherweight star Bubba Jenkins, it means the world.
Uniform ramifications. Our resident beardman, Luke Thomas, elaborates on how the new UFC Athlete Outfitting policy pushes the boundaries of what it means for fighters to be independent contractors.
Kimbo to Bellator? So, Combat Press reported late last night that Kimbo Slice signed with Bellator. This is a real thing that may be actually happening in 2015. MMA, the gift that keeps on giving. (And giving... and giving...)
Shut it down. Ricardo Lamas wins the weekend.
"What was going through my head? Not today, motherf**ker. You're not gonna take this from me today." - Donald Cerrone, certified crazyman.
Kinda cringeworthy interview here, but Paige VanZant handles it pretty well. Fun stuff, otherwise.
You guys are killing it with the fanmade promos lately! Today's offering comes from our own Philip Hanna. Let the man know what you think.
Interesting McGregor angle here that I haven't seen explored before. The UG's Jonathan Shrager speaks to Dee Devlin, Conor's longterm girlfriend who has experienced the Irishman's unbelievable rise firsthand.
THIS, I LIKE THIS
Cathal Pendred (@PendredMMA) January 15, 2015
Dan Henderson (@danhendo) January 15, 2015
SOMEONE'S STILL NOT A FAN
Someone was stuttering a lot today on @espn anybody else catch it?— Diego Sanchez UFC (@DiegoSanchezUFC) January 15, 2015
I stutter after the craziest adrenalin packed FOTY & he calls me a brain dead stuttering fool! Then goes on ESPN sounding punch drunk #fact— Diego Sanchez UFC (@DiegoSanchezUFC) January 15, 2015
ONE MORE CALLOUT FOR GOOD MEASURE
Patricio Freire (@PatricioPitbull) January 15, 2015
@PatricioPitbull heard it before. Jus bring yo A game son— Daniel Straus (@DanielStraus) January 15, 2015
THE DIAPER'S A NICE TOUCH
Race for the title haha take a wild guess who's who? http://t.co/huhLGqqaYm— Luke Rockhold (@LukeRockhold) January 15, 2015
Announced yesterday (Thursday, January 15, 2014):
FANPOST OF THE DAY
Today's Fanpost of the Day comes from an old regular, heavyfl0w, who brings us: The MMA Rundown #6: MMA Fighters Say Dumb Things & Other Shockers
It's time for another edition of the rundown, kiddos. Buckle up for an oversized dose of what Chuck Klosterman calls "the lowest form of criticism", which is "pointing out something (obviously) stupid and reiterating how stupid it (obviously) is". I must do this. I must do this because sometimes I read quotes so brazenly dumb and poorly thought out that the armchair psychologist lurking inside of me screams "Get on your intertube webzine and pick ‘em apart like buzzards on a s**t wagon!" (My inner armchair psychologist sounds alot like Yosemite Sam.) Maybe I'll chitchat about some fights, too. Who knows.
"All these people who talk about fighting, it's like a million virgins watching a porno. They've never had sex, but they all want to put their input in. It's ridiculous. They all have their input, but until you've been in a fight you have no clue what it's like. That's the bottom line. It's like sex. Until you've done it, you have no clue what's going on."
Why should I be bothered by a quote from the immortal Cody McKenzie? There's no reason. It's embarrassing to admit that a man who once fought a fight in the UFC wearing 8 dollar basketball shorts (with the tag still on) can bother you with something he says. But he did. Bit by bit.
Found something you'd like to see in the Morning Report? Just hit me on Twitter @shaunalshatti and we'll include it in Monday's column.