It's a hilarious coincidence that on the same day Kenny Florian retired, "Bigfoot" Silva's manager came out and said all elbows on the ground should be illegal because all they do is cause cuts. Well, Florian's ‘hellbows' probably have something to say about that.
But I digress. Tonight grounded elbows are fair game, Florian will be in the broadcast booth, and Martin Kampmann and Jake Ellenberger will battle it out to become the latest stud of the welterweight division. Of course, that's without forgetting the man, the beard, the legend, Johny Hendricks, or the either of the two champions who have made themselves unavailable in one way or another.
In fact, in a division where after tonight seven of the top-10 fighters will either be co-champions, "number-one contenders," best friends with a champ, or middleweights, it's hard to grasp what tonight's result actually means aside from a notch in the win column. Because you and I both know, the fight that could happen -- Hendricks vs. winner of Condit/St. Pierre in 7-to-12 months -- isn't nearly as satisfying as the fight that should happen -- winner of Kampmann/Ellenberger vs. Hendricks -- and UFC officials are probably 100-percent aware of this.
So for now, let's just forgot about things like flustered rankings or clogged divisions. Both these men are very, very good at violence, and really, what more could you ask for on a Friday night?
5 MUST-READ STORIES
TUF Live Finale weigh-ins. All fighters met their required weight at Thursday's TUF Live Finale weigh-ins, including welterweight headliners Jake Ellenberger and Martin Kampmann. A replay of the proceedings can be seen here.
MMA student paralyzed. Devin Johnson, a 22-year-old student at Urijah Faber's California gym, tragically dislocated his spine during a takedown attempt in a guillotine choke.
Kenny Florian retires. Longtime UFC contender Kenny Florian officially announced his retirement from mixed martial arts on Thursday.
Analyzing Fedor. Jack Slack breaks down the striking technique of legendary heavyweight Fedor Emelianenko in this behemoth of a visual dissection.
Bigfoot Silva's manager calls for elbow ban. Alex Davis, the manager of Antonio "Bigfoot" Silva, took to the UG to defend his client's loss to Cain Velasquez at UFC 146 and call for a ban on grounded elbows.
There's no way to gracefully transition into this one, but here's the heart-wrenching local news report about Devin Johnson.
Seven years ago, Martin Kampmann blasted Brendan Seguin into a highlight reel for the ages. Zuffa came calling soon after.
The UFC just released its first trailer for Silva-Sonnen II, and while it isn't as goosebump-inducing as NickTheFace's version, it'll still get your blood pumping. (Seriously, if you're not excited for this fight, you're just not a fight fan.)
After nine years, four weight classes, and three title shots, Kenny Florian finally hung up his gloves, and the guys at MiddleEasy were there to document it.
The resourceful folks over at TMZ dug up yet another mugshot, and this time it's the reigning UFC light heavyweight champ.
CALLING IT QUITS
Royce Gracie (@realroyce) May 31, 2012
Means a lot to read fans comments but when I get tweets from other fighters like @realroyce & others, I get emotional. Thank u guys! Much ❤— Kenny Florian (@kennyflorian) June 1, 2012
READY TO GO
On weight and flexing it! twitter.com/MartinKampmann…— Martin Kampmann (@MartinKampmann) May 31, 2012
God is good. This Sat I'm gonna be Bad! I just snorted 2 lines of Gun Powder. Forgive me Lordfor what I'm about to do Sat night!— phil baroni (@philbaroni) May 31, 2012
@UrijahFaber thanks for being a great coach and leading me here!— Michael Chiesa (@MikeMav22) May 31, 2012
Announced yesterday (Thursday, May 30, 2012):
FANPOST OF THE DAY
Today's Fanpost of the Day features Lionel Sng yearning for the days when anything was possible: 5 things I miss about classic MMA (with video evidence)
Of testicles and teeth, having them and losing them. This is one way to look at classic MMA fights. We take a look back at some old bouts, before corner cams got sponsored by snacks companies and losing fighters got paid even if they lost. Here are 5 reminders why early MMA was truly as real as it gets and why it's enjoyable even to this day.
3. No gloves, No mouth guard, No Problem
Gerard Gordeau vs. Teila Tuli (UFC 1, 1996)
Speaking of weight differences, when Dutch Savate fighter Gerard Gordeau entered the cage at UFC 1, he faced Sumo Wrestler, Teila Tuli, who was almost 200lb heavier. Not that it mattered since Gordeau promptly kicked him in the face and socked him with a bare fist, winning the fight via referee stoppage. The story goes that Tuli's tooth landed in front of a potential UFC sponsor right after it was knocked out by Gordeau's roundhouse to the face. I guess it wouldn't have happened if the 420lb Sumo Wrestler from Hawaii wore a mouth guard. Too bad the strongest part of his body is his ‘heart' and not his teeth (watch the pre-fight interview).
Found something perfect for the Morning Report? Just hit me on Twitter @shaunalshatti and we'll include it in Monday's post.